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In its own odd way. Today while at work, we had bomb threat, now normally I would celebrate, but today some added opression was in the air. Until I realized the bomb threat was for another building in the complex, yet it was good to get off the phones and just be out in the sunshine throwin the football. I think we need more afternoons like that, not necessarily due to a bomb threat but you konw a good day of tossin the ball when we should be workin. Good way to get rid of a bit o stress.

My dreams have taken another turn, no longer are they the nice trippnotic visions of what I may want to see at the time. They now have lives of their own, they show me things from my past, possibl futures, and worst of all what is worst in me. I see what I have and can become. I don't like it, I never have, I think I've been running from it for the majority of my life. I did embrace it one time in my life, but that was the ultimate mistake and now I'm still paying for it. Why don't I just find a way to conquer it, you might ask. Well truth be told I realy don't know how it would be possible to rid my self of these things. After all in a wierd way they help make me, well, me. I don't know I'm just confused, put off, and yet strangely pulled towards this side of me which I have pretty much given up for dead. Who knows. Oh well enough speculation its time to just go go go, I'm tired of work today.