Though they are pretty cute when you've had as much sleep as they have.
I just wish she would sleep through the night. Though I spose I could help in that department by trying to get her on a schedule.
This requires me getting up early.
This in turn requires me to get some sleep at night.
Im running on booze and caffeine right now and she is running on water and tickles, I need to figure out how to turn those two things into energy.

In my online travels this evening, as Ri watched Ice Age from my lap, I've found some pretty funny shiz. Careful now, because most links open a new window, I did however try to keep the links that were related in the same window.

First was this post from ljdrama That would be this link about giggles
So she whores, er…puts herself up on ebay for auction(this isn't even the original, apparently she's had 2 other auctions. But shite, first is the lied about measurements and second, ewwwwww, no wonder that auction has no bidders. Im not the hottest guy in the world but I sure wouldn't drop the cash needed to get this cyber chick. The best part though was the fact that this drama led me ito check her user info and I saw that she had as a friend so I clicked since Im the curious type.

As with all journals I perused and happened upon this jem. So apparently another “domme” has taken her disclaimer as her own. Granted it is cool, it just looks dumb when one takes the work of another and tries to pass it off as one's own. On that page try to highlight the top part of the page. If you can't read that, go to View on your browser and click on View Source on the list. Notice the keywords listed are the same color as the background. Hidden keywords as it were. Yikes, I went through the site and thought the navigation pleasent, but then I remembered the hijacked index page, probably not her code. Then there are the “glamour shots” pics, that just doesn't make me fear and want to please my mistress. Better yet check this page out. She lists the types of slaves she needs and wants, complete with nice nice pics. Ummmm again I just don't feel the need to drop to my knees and lick her boots. Notice as well the plethora of banners for various fetish sites. It just screams tryin to make a buck off of nuttin. Funny funny shite.
Just had to share.

I remember when I wanted nothing more than that.
Now I want to live.
Not simple survival, but live a full life.
I want to see the world again with the person I love.
I want to show my daughter the world I've seen and do see through my eyes.
I want to hoard my memories and pass them on to her when she is old enough to appreciate them.
I want the world to feel the what I any party I went too.
i just want!

Though I can do without the blood, gore and mayhem of yester year.
I've been beaten more time than I'd like to recount.
I've actually won 2 fights my entire life.
Only one fight has been one on one out of all of them.
I remember fighting just to release frustration.
My ribs still remember the pain.

Im glad the drama is gone.
Im glad nobody but close friends would even think about calling late at night.
Im almost glad no one calls for a booty call anymore.
I've found being a father really isn't that bad.
Even if you are the “father” of your close circle of friends.

I hope J comes to grips with his family situation soon.
I wonder if I'll ever be able to help him with it.
Im happy Im not addicted to anything anymore.
I wonder if the world I see is the same world everybody else sees.
Honestly, I hear some of that crap can jack you up.
I hope the colors never fade from my view.

I came, I saw, I partied, and now I just want to live.

I haven't been updating lately because of the mix of emotions I feel. So I think I will post them into categories right now just to get it all off my chest, the good and the bad.

The bad:

• Right now we have no hope of getting the car as planned this semester
• I don't broach the subject of the car often because Im sure my beautiful wife feels somewhat responsible for that issue, but it seems as if the lack of car affects me more directly than her.
• It became painfully apparent that I can't last much longer without a car the other night when I got a call at work with both my girls in tears. I practically ran home from work, which sucked.
• I really would like to buy a new car because Gus doesn't have all the extras I would like, not only that I think he's only worth $800 right now and that's with the cd player installed, take that out and you lose $100 of his value
• Im just getting tired of relying on others to help me get from work and get random errands done
• Work
• I feel like all the wrong people are getting all the goodness at work, and that all my hard work counts for nothing.
• I've finally started my way into the kitchen, since Ive no real want to stay on the floor besides my few die hard regulars who keep coming in
• Did I mention how I think the wrong people are getting the accolades at work?
• Im tired of “the customer”, Ive no patience or love for them anymore, especially since the average tip has seemed to fallen after the holidays.
• My daughter's inability to sleep
• Yeah no sleep and not too much success in the rest of my life are taking their toll
• This is leading to a lot of contention between the two love birds known as parents
• Money
• Yeah we don't have enough and we are barely subsitance living, so I often wonder if we can even afford a car when we get one
• The fact that barely enough money comes in to take care of us leads me down the dark road of realizing that without my daughter we wouldn't be in these financial straits, this line of thinking has kept me up many a night because I don't like it and I feel guilty

The muthafuckin good! Yeah I need more good Im sure but these keep me goin

• My immediate family (Tha gurls)
• Im sure it's an old cliche but it's a good one. They keep me goin and keep me sane in my darkest hours
• Being in total infatuation with the woman I married
• Yeah I don't think I've lost the whole total infatuation with my wife, she knows this because I tell her I love her.
• If anybody has kept me sane and capable of dealing with the world at large it's been her, my rock and comfort.
• Thanx baby
• My family's support
• This includes mum/aba/bros/sis and extended fam, everybody who has helped with rides babysitting and just general venting grounds
• This does not include, however, my lil bros latest drama, UGH!
• The fact that at least where I work right now I kind of enjoy
• I love my co-workers and most of my management, Im just tired of giving money suggestions and not being heard
• The fires of finding new employment being rekindled
• I figure if I can find a new job that happens during the day I can just take the bus and not worry too much about a car
• Or even a new resturant with easy money and better hours, late nights and babies do not make for happy household
• Again my immediate family
• It's amazing how love and cuteness really do make things easier to deal with

This seems like a bleak post as I read back into it, but I figure well I need one of those to help me remember what's good and keeps me goin. Now I need to go get read for work and make sure a baby gets snacks, piss off!